A lull of silence chased by a flow of tears. Another black man/woman murdered at the hand of a uniform meant to protect. I'm overwhelmed, sick, mourning.
Checking social media with caution, my timeline includes videos, personal opinions and essays, media outlets painting pictures of the deceased and defender, and other knee-jerk reactions. Here, it's easy to wade and soon drown in the negativity; to stir up and pour into fury. Understand, I AM angry. This is not the life we're meant to live and defend. Freedom should be inclusive for all human beings ... but it seems living black has always been a crime, with punishment uncalled for.
But I can't let the negativity consume me. Nothing I produce from it -- at work, at home, in my relationships -- will be productive. I have to purge.
I am consciously practicing self-care to rid myself of negativity and protect my magic: daily affirmations, opting out from watching the videos and live streams of brutality, recognizing and honoring how I'm affected emotionally and physically, and surrounding myself with my tribe, supporting one another. Releasing negativity takes intention. It's a thoughtful carrying of compassion for yourself and the world you live in -- knowing it desperately needs Him.
It's my prayer that I can reproduce the positivity, compassion, and change I've experienced into this hurting world. As a vessel of the Most High, I am available for this charge. In this space, I am empowered ... in this space I am determined to live abundantly, to share in this overflow.